Stupid Criminals and Their Bizarre Crime Sprees

Bizarre, featured

Criminals are stupid. Well, most of them. Some of them may not be stupid per se, but they still engage in some seriously strange criminal activity. Below are some of our recent favorite stupid criminals and their bizarre crime sprees.

1. Strange Thieves Make Off With 60 Tons of Corn From Train in Brazil

 

corn

I’m in the mood for corn…..60 tons of it.

Now that’s a crime you wouldn’t think of off the bat, eh? Did we mention that the train was moving too? The story is that cops in Sao Paulo in 2009 investigated the theft of almost 60 US tons of corn from a moving train. The police report stated that the criminals put grease on the tracks. This made the wheels of the locomotive skid. The train then slowed down, and they got a tow truck with a hook to steal the containers filled with corn. This happened in a sparsely settled region about 200 miles from the capital.

These criminals probably are not exactly dumb; this is a pretty twisted and ingenious little plot. But did they figure out what they were going to do with 60 TONS OF GRAIN? Pretty dumb.

2. Idiot Mother Tumble Drys Child for Punishment

dryer

I think this criminal probably qualifies as stupid. A woman in Iowa by the name of Mallory Ann Hakes was arrested in 2009. Her crime? Her 22 month-old son crawled into the dryer to hide. Miss Mallory decided to engage in a little negative reinforcement so she shut the boy inside and turned the dryer on for several seconds with the child inside. The kid was not injured, but Mallory is seriously stupid.

3. Perverted Moron Hides Camera in Air Freshener, Foiled by 4 Year-Old

air freshener



So a Texas pervert decided he wanted to get his rocks off by putting a hidden camera in the changing room of a recreation center in Plano. So he came up with the clever plot of putting a tiny camera and microphone in a wall air freshener. Great! Sadly for him, a 4 year-old boy knocked it off the wall in the first hour it was up. He didn’t know what it was so he did what kids do – grabbed it. The mother put it on the counter outside the changing room. A supervisor later discovered the recording device inside.

The idiot was arrested. He DID get to view one 10 year-old girl undressing. Hope it was worth it, sicko.

4. Incredibly Stupid Criminals Rob Bank Next to Their House

robbery-in-progress

Everyone loves a quick commute to work. But if you are a bank robber, or trying to be one, a short commute is a BAD idea. Maryland police arrested a really stupid brother and sister in 2010 for trying to rob an M&T bank that was on the same block as their house. They gave a note to a teller demanding cash, and then they ran out. They arrived home about 2 minutes later and were arrested the same day. Now THERE is a good, old-fashioned pair of idiot criminals. they are going to need a criminal defense attorney

5. Demented Moron Threatens to Blow Up Best Buy Because They Were Sold Out of Call of Duty

best-buy

Any time someone says that violent video games should be severely restricted because they cause violence, I think, oh come on. Nonsense. Criminals are criminals no matter what.

Well…..in Colorado, a certain moron gamer by the name of Loromin Sar went batshit when his local Best Buy was sold out of the new video game Modern Warfare 3. Most normal humans seem to be able to understand the difference between machine gunning and incinerating people in video games as opposed to reality. Not Sar. He pre-0rdered the new game and showed up after the midnight release of the game.

When he was informed they were sold out, he asked the staffers when they were leaving work. He intended to shoot them in the parking lot. Then he threatened to blow up the whole damn store. Then or course the cops were called and the moron was arrested.

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